5. We shouldn’t be wearing “Free Imprisoned Rapper/Celebrity” T-shirts.  At least not for just anybody. And really there’s only one reason why. These dudes ain’t innocent. They did that shit. I support some leniency for certain crimes. Pimp C went to jail for violating probation. His fault, but that’s not as bad as other crimes. But most of the time these rappers get what they’re supposed to deserve. I know we love their music, and as long as their in jail, we won’t hear anything new from them, but I’m sure you got some innocent rappers in your ipod that can tie you over in the meantime.

It says Corey Miller aka C-Murder. His rap name was Murder

“Free C-Murder”? Really? He shot and killed somebody and it’s on tape. It’s like the real life version of  the Caine and O’Dog stickup tape. He can stay in jail. His music wasn’t hot enough for me to put on that shirt. You also have the “Free O.J. Simpson” shirts. Sad. They even come in women’s sizes. It’s just sad when the same people wearing these shirts have cousins and friends in jail. I’m not saying you should make a shirt for them either tho. Outside of your block or high school, nobody would know who Tyrone “Tee Tee” Thompson is anyway. And besides, he shot 3 people, held up 2 corner stores and stole my Jordans. Lil Tee Tee need to stay his ass in jail until he figure out something else to do. I know everybody loves T.I. He’s a Grammy award winner and up and coming actor. I’m sure he’s not a killer. But to be fair, he was caught with enough guns to give out to everybody at a Lakers/Cavs game. So let’s think about it, before we put on one of these shirts. Maybe reserve these for the people that really deserve to be freed like, Mandela, Andy Dufresne, or for Wesley Snipes when he ultimately forgets to pay his taxes again. He can’t help it. Leave Wesley alone.

4. I don’t like seeing turtlenecks in the club. I’m not against turtlenecks. I used to wear them. It’s a fashionable look and they look great if you’re in a Tyler Perry movie, but I just don’t think it’s a good look for the club. I understand the thought of wearing one. It says “I’m grown, I’m mature, and I’m most likely bald or got a goatee”.

I get it. And when the cold weather strikes, it seems like a good idea to put one on when you hit the club. But you forget, the temperature inside the club is probably 3 times warmer than it was outside. So what started out as “I’m gonna get my grown man on”, quickly turns into “I’ve should’ve worn a nicer shirt under this so I can take it off”. It’s hard enough dressing for the club during the winter season, because you’ll always have to decide whether to be cute and cold or warm and uncomfortable. But putting on a turtleneck is usually a lose/lose situation. You can really only take thick fabric around your neck for about 10 minutes before you start to get frustrated. Being at the club with one on cuts that time in half. And it’s really hard to fit the turtleneck the proper way. Unless your Michael Jai White or Morris Chestnut, your body gets lost in the turtleneck and you look like you wore a baggy neck brace. Or you bought the thinner, more fit turtleneck. And if that’s the case, it’s not really keeping you warm and you wore the turtleneck for nothing. And now it looks like you’re wearing the NIKE dry fit turtleneck. And they don’t even make those.

3. Men shouldn’t rap or sing at their other guy friends in the club. Let me explain. You’re at the club with your homeboys. A hot song comes on, and you automatically wana say the words along with the music. You’re lookin at one of your boys reciting the words like you’re in the video. But what you don’t realize is you’ve been singing “Baby you’re my everything, You’re all I ever wanted..” to another man for the last 3 minutes. It’s very easy to forget what you’re doing and get caught up in the music. That’s what people do at the club. They dance and sing the words to their favorite songs. You just gotta be careful who you’re directing it at. If you’re having a guys night out and there’s no girls around, you might wana sing along quietly in your head or at least be looking at the closest chick in site. If you do happen to be lookin at your boy, you and him both may know that you ain’t singing for him, but to any onlooker, you’re seranading him and probably gonna leave early together. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. I’m just saying.

2. If I happen to look at a hot chick walking by, and you’re another dude who I don’t know who sees the same hot chick, don’t talk to me about how hot she is. You don’t have to tell me she’s hot. I know she’s hot, and that’s why I looked and I know that’s why you looked too.  I know you’re probably thinking, “What’s the big deal? What’s wrong with that?” Well the problem is, most of the time the guy who makes the comment tries to overcompensate and say something nasty or too innapropriate to say to a complete stranger. Like:

“Yo I’d f**k the s**t out of her” or

“Damn did you see those ti**ies?”

First of all, yeah I saw them joints and second, are we in 3rd grade? You don’t have to prove your masculinity or ability to spot an attractive chick to me. I don’t know you and don’t really care. We’re men and most of us have a pretty good handle on who the hot chicks are. Except for maybe Matthew Broderick. And honestly, there’s no reason to speak to another man you don’t know in the club unless it’s to say “My bad” after bumping into someone or to relay some vitally important information like “Yo, you’re bleeding!” or “You’re hair is on fire”.

1. If you’re jeans have a little loop in the back for holding things like hammers, screwdrivers or any other tools, you might be wearing carpenter jeans. And if you’re wearing carpenter jeans, you should stop immediately. There was a point in our generation where carpenter jeans were common and cool. That was point was called “late 1990 somethin”.

There have been so many evolutions in denim since then. We had the huge Jynco jean era, the rough and tough Rocawear denim era, the baggy with deep back pockets with patches all over em era, and most recently, the skinny jean era. With the plethora of jean choices to pick from, picking up a pair of carpenters is just lazy and shows you have no interest in current trends.  Or that you’re a carpenter. If that’s the case, I apologize for my criticism. But to see those in the club is just heartbreaking. I wasn’t a big supporter of skinny jeans, but I would much rather see those than to see you wearing the only style of jeans that come with a handle. So next time you’re out looking for a new pair of jeans, do some research first. And by research I mean watch MTV, or the CW or look in a magazine or something. Look for something with less secret and hidden pockets. Those should be signals that say “Bad Idea Jeans”. I’ve said all this, but really the trick is to be comfortable in the jeans you’re wearing. That and not buying jeans at a place that also sells paint thinner, Doc Martens or fishing reel.